Quick entry
Illinois was okay. My uncle got nicely drunk and embarrassed everyone enough until we see them again next year. Unlike my moms side of the family, my dads side does not have the closeness where visiting every few months is necessary.

OOOh my Uncle Jeff (on my moms side) did call me to see if I wanted to baby-sit for new years. Of course I said yes right away because I love his kids, and he and my aunt need to get out. He told me I was more than welcome to bring Evan along, but knowing how much my mom doesn’t trust us…I don’t see that happening unfortunately. That would just make everything so perfect.

I feel horrible because I don’t know what is happening with Benji although I would like to think that our lack of friendship these days is not my fault, I’m sure I’m not the greatest person to be around. I wish we could go back to the old days to the friendship that he barely remembers, but the one that meant the world to me. I guess that’s what happens when you alienate everyone. I’m sorry Ben…and everyone else too.

That’s all I wanted to say for now. Evan I love you so much, you make me so happy and I can’t imagine being without you. Ben you also make me happy and I wish we could get back what we once had. goodnight...i want to go to bed before i get any sicker :-/


i forgot to say that i got into Loyola....unfortunately my last name is not ZOLP or else i could have a full ride there. Flippin parents.

so i got into DePaul which is my top choice school, and MSU...I'm still waiting to hear from K and Loyola, but 4/6 isn't bad. I'm so excited about DePaul...ok time to go find a way to entertain myself, katy is spending the weekend here, and i'm excited. I'm kinda pissed about the whole formal thing, but its getting worked out, and I'm just gonna go with the flow of things....mmmm can't wait to see evan all dressed up

Its official….I hate my computer. This is the 3rd time trying to write this fucking entry. I’m about to give up. No wonder I haven’t written for 5 months. OK to try to repeat what I said the first two times…a lot has happened in the 5 months that I haven’t written in. For instance….I traveled to France, I found a wonderful boyfriend while I was there (ok so I’ve known him for 6 years…I’m just a little slow), I lost my best friend, I had a horrible swim season, my aunt had a new baby, I applied to college, I finished work, and I had the first snow day of the year.
Today is a snow day…which is excellent because I got to sleep in, go to breakfast, and not go to school, but it also sucks because it means I don’t feel like working, and I have a huge organic Chemistry test tomorrow. So instead I’m choosing to write in my blog and get caught up on everything that I’ve missed writing about.
4 days after my last entry I left for France. Everything about the trip was great…except for the teacher, the last night, and walking everywhere we went in $2.00 sandals from target. Don’t get me wrong, I loved my sandals, but I wore a whole in them by wearing them every day for 2 weeks, but shoes and shorts look so dorky. Wow I’m talking about what I wore in France :-/ but the trip was so long ago, I don’t remember much else. I’m hoping to have pictures up soon…. 4 months and STILL no pictures…I’m really really lazy. I thought I would put up captions with my pictures, but I think I’m just going to get them onto the Internet so people can view them…if people want captions they can ask someone who remembers where we went. I can’t wait for one day when I can run away to Nice…It was the best part of the trip/my life. I want to live on the ocean, and WOW I miss it
While in France I began dating Evan. Its been the best four and a half months that I’ve had in a really long time. That’s 4 times longer then any relationship I’ve been in before, and he has made it so wonderful. However it has also been a bad four months, not because of him but because in these four months (and a few before) I lost my best friend, Emily.
I still don’t know if I made the right decision in deciding not to be friends with her anymore. I lost respect for her when all she started to care about was getting high, drinking, and having sex. I feel as though it was my fault for maybe never taking the time to realize who she was…or maybe she never took the time to figure out who she was, and that’s what led her to everything she now does. I’ll let you know if I made a good choice one I stop crying so much because I miss her. Its hard being best friends with someone for 2 years, and sitting next to them everyday after we “broke up” and not even talking, let alone looking at each other. I just miss all the fun times we had together and I wish I had someone in my life I could talk to about my boy problems (its hard to talk to Evan about those…because he is the boy problems if I have them). I miss sitting and talking for hours, and just laughing…and of course making fun of all the assholes that go to our schools.
I also had a shitty swim season. Part of it could have been that I was sad through most of it, another part could have been changing pools 50 times because ours decided to leak, or it could have been the crappy coaching I experienced. Whatever it was, I had horrible times, and that didn’t help my already melancholy mood.
I applied to 6 colleges and have heard from 2 that I’ve been accepted. Tomorrow is my onsite for Michigan State University. It scares me that the 2 colleges that I REALLY want to go to haven’t sent me back a response yet. I check the mail daily! Here are the colleges that I applied to in order of the ones I wish to attend: DePaul, Loyola, MSU, DePauw…its in Indiana (accepted), Western Michigan University (accepted), and Kalamazoo College. Just thinking about college makes my heart beat faster, I’m so nervous to leave everything I know, but at the same time SOOO excited to get away. I don’t want to say that I’m running away from my problems…but I am, and I’m also very much okay with that for some reason.
My aunt had a new baby…I got to see him when he was only 5 days old, at Thanksgiving (which Evan came with me too). It was so nice My whole family was together, which hasn’t happened for a few years now. The 25 of us got together and had a great time drinking, eating, and playing cards…as tradition goes. There was a little hostility between my sister and I, because…. She’s a bitch. But beyond that all was well, and having my best friend/boyfriend with me was the best thing about it.
Ok so now I’m so far behind on the things I had planned to do today. I suppose I should stop writing and go work. Good plan. I’ll try to write way more often than every 5 months. Ttfn…TA TA for now.

man i haven't had any sleep...and i'm usually in bed by 11 every night. sucky work. totally different then last time...i still don't do much work, but the people are loosing their flare and i don't know how much longer i can tolerate stupid people. today i hung out with two of my main damies...but the third was missing. it was very sad because i miss my other fool I'm so tired. i submit that i should go to bed. hmm evan made me 2 country mixes...he is the best EVER! i think its time for bed almost.

now that work has begun i have no time for anything. Well ok so i'm lying...i also swim, and weekends i get to spend time with my friends. Lets see....work. It's been really fun actually, my job is the most laid back job in the world. The people are very fun, and kate and i have even been getting along...how crazy is that? This weekend i went to south haven with my two damies evan and em. I have so many excellent stories from it...but none that should be put down. But i will say, emily is awesome at faking things. hmmm ben got back tonight, he was in colorado. crazy benji, crazy colorado. hmmm man i suck....OH joel got home on the 23rd and i got to see him the day after. that was the best experience of my life. It had been 10 months since i'd seen him. but he left again for the week....but when he gets back...i will be super happy. Man i'm so tired. Time for bed.

so today ben took me put put golfing AND bought me coffee. I submit that he is the greatest person alive....oh he also made me a mix. Evan was yelling at me because i haven't posted in a while. I've been grounded though which is never fun. plus my mom gets real mad when i post, so i gotta do it in secret now. We bought another house...i'd like to call it my party house hmm so i'm not sure what to do. I'm trying to figure out who i like -- and thats not working so well for me. I don't want a boyfriend, but i def. need play...if anyone is interested...let me know. grr i need sleep real bad. Anyways i guess i'll end this by apologizing to anyone if i made shit awkward or weird. i just can't help myself. ok off to bed i go.

Hmmm so two of my good friends had this plan that we were going to get together and make dinner. So then one of my friends invited her b/f and he brought his friend along who is kinda hooking up with my other friend. So we ate dinner and played euchre...both of which were fun...except i got my ass kicked in euchre cuz my partner didn't know how to play. Then we decided to watch a movie, which was fine and dandy....except everyone like paired off, leaving me all by myself and feeling very akward. Emily is with her brother....partying...and she called me, and i talked to her for a few minutes. I really wanted to leave, but i didn't want to be rude. i really wish i would have had someone to go with me...but whatever

I have never laughed so hard in my entire life as i did tonight. Halcy told me that she got really pissed at everyone in her group because they were either bitchy, or didn't do anything. Apparently she has to be like mother fuckin goldie-locks and everything has to be just right. So while talking to her, I was laughing like crazy.
I cleaned my room today, sent off for my passport (finally) and watched part of "princess bride" chosen by my good friend benji. Ben was very entertaining....i was sad when he had to go. Mitch came over to watch it too...it was a rockin good movie. I've decided to quit school and run away to somewhere far far away. There was a killer storm...it was very pretty outside, unless you were driving in it, then it wasn't so fun. I dunno...but jessica song has the best laugh EVER.
I'm off to bed